No one suspects the Days to be Gods.
That is at bottom the only courage that is demanded of us: to have courage for the most strange, the most singular and the most inexplicable that we may encounter. Rainer Maria Rilke My scans came back clean last week, so the way the math works for me is that I now feel like I have six months to live, at the least. Because even if my scans come back unclean in three months, at the end of the summer, and even if the cancer mutates in a way which resists available treatment options, it would likely take at least another three months for us to figure all that out, for the cancer to have dominion over my body, which is its goal. And so if I am honest about this, and I am trying so hard to look as much of this in the eye as I can, this means I have at least three more months of the relative good health I have right now, with the strength to walk to the bog with the dog several times a day, the ability to wander the sculpture gardens in Lincoln, as I did last week with Cameron, to accompan